INTRO
Hi, I hope all is well. In this talk, I just want to go over something that has been really, really helpful for me, and something that can help you a lot as well. I think it can help all of us, and it’s definitely something that is tricky and a little difficult at times for myself, and I know for many others as well, it can be tricky and difficult, but it’s a really good topic to learn about, and I want to share it, because I know that it can be life changing for a lot of people.
BEING A GOOD FINDER
So the main teaching is has to do with being a good finder instead of a fault finder. So I heard that from a teacher, a self development teacher, a long time ago, and it’s something that over time, Every so often, I’m almost struck by it and pulled back into it to realize that that is exactly where I need to be, is to be a good finder, and not a fault finder, and that it starts with ourselves, that it starts with ourselves, and it stays with ourselves, and then it would emanate naturally to other people…
But for many of us, it can be very advantageous to stay in that space, of being a good finder for ourselves, to look internally and to Feel our own good qualities and our own good, yeah, good qualities and good nature. And really appreciate these qualities of ours. So we’re being a good finder when we look internally, and this has to do with self esteem and everything like that. So when we look internally and we look at our good qualities, we can just stay in that space for a while…
YOUR GOOD QUALITIES…
And experience just how healing that is, just to be a good finder… so you can look internally, and you might say, Oh, this quality of Mine, and it could be anything, right? Oh, I’m… Just as an example, someone might be very forgiving, and you say, Oh, that’s a, that’s an amazing quality of mine, right? I’m so grateful for it. I love that about myself, and it’s called forgiveness, and it’s an amazing quality. Maybe it’s that for now and you just stay there for a moment…
Maybe it is strength and boundaries, right? These are all qualities that are amazing, and whatever these are that are in you, that you notice that are strong.
So the main teaching there, again, it was a self development talk, and it was being a good finder, not a fault finder. So when we look inside, you’re careful- not looking for things that you feel bad about. You’re not looking for those things. There’s things we we we work on, right? We’re honest about it. We can work on it, but to make sure that we’re taking note of and appreciating these good qualities, we’re finding the good within ourselves, that that’s where we’re kind of aiming to find and see the good within ourselves and really appreciate that. So that’s a good place to be, and it’s good to stay in that space.
So whatever your good qualities are that you notice, or maybe someone else noticed it and brought it to your attention… something to be grateful for.. Really feel it out and let yourself know like, wow, I really appreciate that about myself. You know, whatever the quality is, maybe it’s, it’s um, you know, honesty, whatever it might be, forgiveness, you know, all these different qualities, strength, fortitude. These are just examples.
BUDDHIST TEACHING OF SELECTIVE WATERING…
So again, that would emanate naturally out to other people. But before going there or TRYING to do that, I think it can be advantageous for many of us to just start with that being a good finder. Now, there’s also an amazing Buddhist teaching that is very similar, and it’s called Selective Watering. And it’s very, very similar. I mean, maybe the same exact thing, just in a in a different, a different way of expressing it, but it’s selective watering. So you are appreciating your good qualities, right? Finding the good and you’re selectively watering those seeds. And that’s all there is to it, right?
So again, those the seeds of whatever it is, say it’s say it is kindness, like maybe you just you, you know, you go about your day and you smile at someone, you ask how they are, and that’s called kindness. And you know that that’s your that’s your natural state, you’re able to then water those seeds. It’s selective watering. You’re finding the good, and you’re selectively watering those seeds. And it’s an, it’s amazing, very special Buddhist teaching that’s that’s helpful for all of us. So it’s called selective watering. So if we can stay in that, when we look internally, we do this is, this is the practice, and it can be tricky or difficult at different times. And for me, it’s just a consistent reminder to look internally with so much love and so much care and understanding and compassion and feel and see the good and appreciate ourselves and appreciate who and what we are.
NOTICING THE SHIFT AS WE APPRECIATE OURSELVES…
So we can appreciate those good qualities, and again, selectively water those qualities. And you might notice, as you do this, there’s almost for many of us, and this is something I keep working on, and it’s, it’s the same for me, there’s almost like a quick, you know, almost like fault finding, or things that you don’t, don’t like about yourself. And we can notice how quick that can be, right? You for many people, it’s, it’s, you know, I have this quality, whatever it is. And, man, I really appreciate that. I love that about myself, and then there’s almost the … oh, you’re not supposed to say that. So let me find something that I don’t like about myself, or maybe some someone else doesn’t like it, right? But let’s leave all that where it is. Let’s just let let that be what it is, and keep focusing on the good, the good quality. Start with your strengths, so you can practice being a good finder. When you look internally, right? You look within with compassion and care and love, feel the good quality, and then selectively water it. And what you’ll notice is, and this is the teaching and and it would naturally emanate to other people. It’s not forced. It’s not something you’re expected to do, or you have to do, is something that happens naturally, and to be able to feel those, those good, amazing qualities that you appreciate within yourself, then you selectively water, or find, you find the good In others, and actually selectively water those seeds. And again, that’s a self development teaching, but also a Buddhist teaching that is very much, very similar, maybe, maybe identical, I wouldn’t want to say that, but very similar.
And you see the other, or you you you know, conversate with someone, and maybe it’s someone you know, and you see that, and you say, wow, like that quality of yours, whatever it is, that strength, that understanding, that wisdom, I see that I appreciate that, and you’re selectively watering, you know, appreciating it really.
I Should say you’re appreciating those qualities in someone else, and that that is an amazing way, an amazing teaching, an amazing way to go about things, because again, it starts with ourselves. This is a great quality of mine, and we can practice again, watering those seeds.
BUDDHIST WISDOM
So there was a line of mine in for rhyme and poetry, and it was… Buddhist wisdom, still comprehending. It’s all refreshing. There was more to it, but, but it’s refreshing, right? These, these teachings, and I’m so grateful for them, and I’m so grateful to understand certain, certain teachings in the way I do… and realize that, that there is, is and just, and just have a lot of gratitude for it. But I believe that these, these teachings can help they help me, and I think they can help a lot of people. So just remember that, in terms of of finding the good within ourselves, right, we’re being a good finder…
BEING A HIGHLIGHTER OF GOOD IN OURSELVES
…And I would share that with a lot of my clients a while back, and I would share,and actually would say, we’re being a Highlighter, right? It was just my way of saying the same exact thing, right? Where it’s almost like you’re highlighting like a page in a book, but when you look internally and you feel and see these great qualities, and they are there, remember that, even if you look internally and you say you know, many people will say, I don’t have great qualities, right? I don’t, I don’t have this, but you do, right? It might seem covered, or maybe we you judge certain parts, but those good qualities are in all of us, and we can highlight, you know, my own words, my own words of it would be you know we’re being a highlighter.
So if we’re to look at internally inside and start appreciating and loving ourselves, fully and these specific qualities that we really like and that we really know are very helpful and amazing qualities. And in my own, you know, my own version of it would be, we’re being a highlighter, right? We’re taking the highlighter and we’re highlighting these, these great qualities of ours. In other words, in the Buddhist teaching would be selective watering, you know, being a good finder, all very similar things, but it’s staying in that space.
So I hope that’s super helpful for you, especially if, if you find it difficult to look in internally with a lot of love and compassion and care, just, you know, boundless or unconditional love and compassion. Look internally, because you deserve that right you deserve, and you’re worthy of that to look internally and feel internally and appreciate yourself fully and love yourself fully.
And again, to quote, a quote from, from Buddhism, I’ll say is you can look everywhere in the in the universe, and there is no one more deserving of your own love than yourself. So if you can take a few breaths and reflect on that for a moment…
You utilize those, those teachings and that wisdom to really build yourself up from from a good place, right, a good foundation. That can be helpful for all of us.
So I wish you the best, so many blessings and happiness.
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Have a great day-
Ryan
RejuvenateThis
